Family, India

Career or Children?

” Career or Children?” is the eternal question that stumps moms all the world and the answer is never easy…

Most moms as young girls were always motivated to do well academically in school and college and achieve greater corporate goals. Eventually, school life gets over, college life gets over and many ace everything and a dream career begins….All goes well and with good time, matrimony arrives and then motherhood dawns.

Motherhood:

If a marriage doesn’t change a woman’s life drastically, motherhood will. Understanding parenthood for anybody is no easy task. Many children have a personality that is totally the polar opposite of their parents! While moms and dads fret over how to handle the new addition to their lives, mothers feel more responsibility towards the child ( and the society always emphasizes this) and therein starts the trouble.

The dilemma:

Most women opt for a maternity break that might span a few weeks or months post the arrival of the child in their career. While fathers return back promptly, most mothers struggle with the decision to get back to work full time.

Even after the child is 6 months of age, while some mothers do return back to their jobs, there are many mothers who are still on the fence about whether to return back to work or not. Many mothers areΒ  “worry warriors” – who are never sure whether their child will get the same care that they can give.

Weeks turn into months and sometimes even years pass by and some women are faced with the same dilemma – “Should I get back to work and hope everything falls into place or should I wait for more time till the child is older?” And sometimes, the child crosses their teenage and moms are still pondering the same question!! πŸ™‚

By this time many mothers lose the interest and energy to get back to work full time… 😦 Some mothers even return back to work and again quit because of “mom guilt” or any other misadventures.. 😦

And if there is more one child in the picture, the responsibilities quadrupule. While most women multi-task a variety of responsibilities – it is still a big juggling act to manage work, home,children, parents, in-laws and all family! πŸ™‚ (and if you are in a nuclear family living away from everybody, then the difficulty is to manage everything on your own) In addition to normal household functions, there are also sick children, homework, class tests, exams, projects and even more responsibilities that add everyday.

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Many women quit their high flying careers entirely or change course from their field of study. For example, as a young girl she might be a Computer Science graduate or an MBA – but due to motherhood and home responsibilities – she might become a teacher(so that she can step out with the kids and step back in with the kids) or a writer(can write from home!!) πŸ™‚ Many mothers readΒ  job description with keywords such as “work from home” , “flexible work options”,”remote work” and they are absolutely delighted! πŸ™‚

This is not to say all mothers put their careers on hold when motherhood arrives..many juggle home and full time work very well and hats off to all of them! πŸ™‚

My experience:

Overall, I think if you wait too long to get back to full time work, most lose the energy and the motivation for the corporate grind. So, for women who are very passionate about their careers, it is just good to restart full time work after just a year of being off….(more feasible in India) – anything more than that – the industry is also moving ahead and we also cannot keep up!

In the end, it all works out well with a little crease here and there… πŸ™‚

So, if you like to work – just keep doing it! πŸ™‚

Thanks for reading and have a lovely day! πŸ™‚